finally.

i have always just wanted to be a mom. to have lots of babies. and just play. and when i got that, i just wanted to be home with them. i think this is why i could NOT pick a major and stick with it in college, because i just. didn't. care. it's not what i wanted. this is.







when we started our nutty, gazelle intense, payoffthisdebtthat'ssuckingthelifeoutofus focus, i was "with" the boys, but not like i wanted. i didn't feel like i could say i'm a stay-at-home-mom, without saying, "well, i stay home sometimes, but they come with me to work mondays and thursdays and we go to another place on tuesday morning, then i work at night and kevin is with them..." etc. now i really, finally FEEL like a stay-at-home mom. and THIS is what i wanted.



and some days i think i'm really, really horrible at it. i can spaz when things don't get put away and then can't be found...don't get me started on "The bad guys GO in the bad guy BUCKET...then we will KNOW where the bad guys are...". and i'm a pretty horrible cook. i suppose we all eat, as we make it from day to day...but i can't even really tell you what we eat. we have days where we watch too much tv. but we usually make up for it the next day by trying to watch none. it's all about balance, i figure. and every day i mean to iron kev's pants for the next day. like a good wife. and most every day he irons his own pants at 10:30pm. i love him. and love that he doesn't expect me to iron his pants anyway. i pretty much look like a slug everyday. because why get dressed if i'm going to get spit up on, and why fix my hair when i'm going to play on the floor? besides...that just means i'll look really good in comparison when i occassionally DO get dressed and ready. right?



but some days are pretty smooth. there's minimal fighting and fussing and whining...and the house stays clean-ish and kids get played with. those are my favorite. i'm pretty excited that we've had more of those recently than the "what in the world did we do today, b/c we sure didn't clean or accomplish anything?" days.



but at the end of both of those days i still love this a lot.




(i don't have a picture yet of all 3 smiling. but i'm getting more and more of at least 2 smiling, and i call that success)

the big boys love their brother. the other day i had leo propped in the corner of the couch while i washed dishes[though i do NOT do this now that he plops on his face, and pushes his feet against the back and propels himself onto the floor. not that that's happened]...and his feet just stayed up b/c he's froggy like like that. and rex got him an ottoman.











when you have more than 1 kid, i assume particularly if they are the same sex, you get asked a LOT who they look more like. and i've always thought leo looked more like rex. some baby pictures are uncanny. gus has always been my chub and had a more round face. but this picture i see some leo-ness. i see gus's eyes, but their smile is very similar.




definitely brothers.

how did i get 3 dimpled boys. love.

going to try to write more in my posts. i used to back in the xanga days and it's fun and i love reading back over those...recently all i do is pictures and it's hard to remember what was going on. so stay tuned.

or skim through for pictures, whichever.